“War is over, if you want it,” that’s what John & Yoko said. But the question is, do you want it? That’s what someone else said. Who said it? I didn’t say it. George Orwell didn’t say it. He just warned against it/// that in the future, that’s all we’d ever do. Well, guess what? The future’s here, and George was right, that’s all we ever do. We fight. What’s the difference between a Muslim extremist and a Christian extremist? It’s whether or not we go to war. When it’s a Christian extremist, we say, “oh well, gosh-- that was awful-- I wish we could’ve done something about it-- but the killer and the victims all had blond hair and blue eyes. It must just be some Hitler youth in-fighting. You know, like gangs in LA in the eighties.”

Cancer cures smoking,
Cancer cures smoking,
Cancer cures smoking,
why doesn’t carnage cure war?

Colors- you know, bloods and crips. Ice T sung it, Sean Penn and Michael Corleone’s consigliere acted in it, and Easy Rider, he directed it. Except in this case, we’re talking Knights Templar vs the Brown Shirts. Red and Blue, but, this time round, more like Blond vs Brown. It’s all still fighting. Right? Or is it? Or is it just more people dead for no reason whatsoever. Glenn Beck should be ashamed-- not that he’s nearly as bad as the guy who did it. He just feeds into it. He’s like the slop for hogs feeding at the crazy-trough. He is fuel to the fire. He is justification. All the reasoning needed for the monster who’s not quite sure about being a monster.

Cancer cures smoking,
Cancer cures smoking,
Cancer cures smoking,
why doesn’t carnage cure war?

He’s the vulture not so quietly jumping up and down just on the edge of the scales of justice. He’s in search of fresh meat. Another shooting of a US Congresswoman or a mass murder in some blue-eyed country. Well, he’s right there to feed on the carnage… But I have gotten off topic. If we’re looking at who’s really to blame-- The game’s all the same. It’s big pharma. It’s 24-7 TV. It’s fast food. It’s high fructose corn syrup and thiamine mono-nitrate. No wonder we’re out of balance. All it takes is one who’s a little more out of balance than the rest, and we’ve got a shooting. Of course, since we’re all so out of balance, it has become what we want. We crave it.

Cancer cures smoking,
Cancer cures smoking,
Cancer cures smoking,
why doesn’t carnage cure war?

I mean, does anyone watch NASCAR or UFC or a cock-fight thrown by Michael Vick for any other reason than to see someone or something get hurt? No. It’s bloodlust. Put it on TV. Feed into the machine. Send out web-bots in search of more carnage to consume. Hell, while we’re at it, does anyone know of any new wars or catastrophes we can film? No? I suppose we could create one. A little more fracking and we’ll have an earthquake on our hands-- If the overall temperature of the earth gets too high, we can just send a massive faux-volcanic eruption into the sky, creating a cloud barrier to prevent any sunlight getting in/// thus bringing the temperature down. That should do it. Right?

Cancer cures smoking,
Cancer cures smoking,
Cancer cures smoking,
why doesn’t carnage cure war?

I know-- wait-- We’re feeding our bloodlust here. Right? Something horrible to put on TV. We could just start another war. That’s it. Why didn’t I think of this before? What’s France up to? Oh, wait. They helped us gain independence-- gave us the statue of liberty-- A country full of mostly Christian white people… Hmmm… Germany? No. After the first two world wars, they really cleaned up their image. And again, that whole Christian/ white people thing. I know… The Buddhists… They don’t fight? Really? I just would’ve thought since they started the whole swasticka thing… Or was that the Hindus? Who can keep it straight? No. You’re right. What about the muslims?// They’ve got some extremists. That’s what I’m talking about… What about the Muslims?// They’ve got some extremists. That’s what I’m talking about.

Cancer cures smoking,
Cancer cures smoking,
Cancer cures smoking,
why doesn’t carnage cure war?

You say they’ve got most of the world’s oil supply too? This is too good to be true. It’s a win-win situation. If we go to war against a Muslim oil-rich country, we could get just about everyone everywhere charged up about this for just about forever. I think we’ve found ourselves a winner. Now we’ve got something to go to war for. But, do we want it? I know I for one, do not. I for one believe everything I read on bumper stickers. That’s why I always say, “move, Asshole”, “A million sperm, and you were the fastest,” and “ban abortion, eat the young instead.” Well, I for one say that cancer cures smoking, why doesn’t carnage cure war?

Cancer cures smoking,
Cancer cures smoking,
Cancer cures smoking,
why doesn’t carnage cure war?

Haven’t we all seen enough carnage for one lifetime? Could it? Would it be possible, if we all turned off all of our TV sets, that there’d be no more need for carnage, no more need for war? No more nothing to feed into? No- we’d still have a taste for all that delicious oil. So why not go cold-turkey on that conundrum as well? Oh- yes-- industry. Lobbyists. Men behind closed doors shaking hands. Well they could be gotten rid of too. Just remember-- war is over, if you want it. The question is, do ya? Do ya punk? Oh, Hollywood, you’ve won me over with your one-liners. I want more Dirty Harry. I will get to work on casting the remake, stat. Does Clint Eastwood have a son? Yes? Mmmm- I like the sound of that.

Cancer cures smoking,
Cancer cures smoking,
Cancer cures smoking,
why doesn’t carnage cure war?